The difference between “you” and “I”

posted in: judging | 0

In the Three Springs journal there was a poem, apparently written by a girl in one of their programs that is, I believe, worth sharing with you. It is entitled “You and I”

You are stubborn and hard headed.
I am understanding and unselfish.
You yell and scream and curse everyone.
I whisper and compliment everyone.
You believe everyone is out to get you.
I believe everyone just wants to help me.
You try to impress people with your style and class.
I impress people by my confidence and intelligence.
I love my friends and family.
You need help and won’t accept it.
I want help and believe it’s working.
The differences between “you” and “I”
Are nothing.

What is the truth here in this poem? Is it the author’s sudden recognition that, while the behaviors that are the expressions of the hearts of the two people are very different, the things that lie within their hearts, their desires, are really the same? I think that when we explore the depths of our hearts, we often find more similarities than differences. As our associate pastor has taught several times in small group leadership events, people fundamentally pursue 5 basic things in relationships:
to know and be known
to love and be loved
to admonish and be admonished
to celebrate and be celebrated
to serve and be served

There is another point to this poem, I believe. In judging others harshly and ourselves gently, we are often projecting onto others the thoughts and feelings about ourselves that we have been unwilling to face. Instead, we put on attractive and sociable happy-face facades and judge ourselves according to how we want others to see us instead of how we know we really are. When we finally are willing to face the truth, we see that we are no different than the people we judge.

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