(8/31/19)
Yesterday I had a sudden, bona fide all-out, in-my-face panic response to an emotional trigger. I logically knew what was happening to me physiologically and emotionally and could not stop it. I’ve watched enough people in panic and waited it out with them to know its course. I simply had to surrender to the autonomic response and ride it out—- the tachycardia, the hyperventilating, the emotionalism that comes from a flood of hormones released from a sudden sense of some sort of danger. A PTSD type reaction to being ambushed by something totally unexpected. How quickly some things can happen. After the physiological response ran its course I was able to respond to the situation and take action. Panic can be immobilizing. Having fluctuating blood pressure issues in recent months has given me a tiny glimpse of appreciation for the ebbs and flows experienced by some who deal with anxiety and live on the edge of an imminent panic attack continuously. But yesterday was my first experience of a panic attack. It’s easy to be frightened by it if you don’t know what’s happening and don’t know to just breathe and wait it out. Bill debated heading to the ER. A friend prayed with me. And in about 45 minutes it all played itself out.
You can’t run from anxiety. You can’t live with it either. Medicating it is dicey. My choice is to get to the root of it and rip it out! Face it down. And be done with it. There is a cure! Perfect love casts out fear. Anxiety is rooted in fear. Find it’s source. The cure is always found in our identity and security in Christ. When we know who we are and whose we are and what tribe we belong to we have all the power and security and authority we need to take what is ours.