Many times I have counseled a person with a dysfunctional family member or close friend that she is not likely to be the one God will use to address this family member’s issues, no matter how much she loves the individual, can see the issues, and wants to help. Sometimes one is simply too close to a situation and has too much history with someone to see the situation with the necessary degree of objectivity or to have sufficient credibility with the person she seeks to help. Help is more likely to come from an unexpected place and person…..at a completely unlikely time…..In such cases the best thing one can do is back away, commit the person to God in prayer, and leave the situation entirely alone. This is the hardest thing to do with someone you love. But when it has reached a point of creating chaos in one’s own life, it is the loving thing to do….both for the individual needing help and the one longing to help, especially when the person at risk doesn’t believe she needs help and is not interested in getting help. You cannot talk a person out of denial. You cannot plead a person out of denial. Only consequences in their lives and God’s grace toward them can prepare them to hear the truth and see the need for change. 8/20/2014
