5/27/14 by Joni Byrd
Saying Goodbye with Grace
I am studying for a degree in counseling, and in a textbook, I recently read a statement about hospice care that really caught my attention. The book stated that it is often during the last days, hours, or even minutes of a person’s life “that lifelong problems are resolved.” This may not be surprising to us, as we have been conditioned to scenes in movies and books of people’s dying professions of love and forgiveness and final words. I will tell you, though…that this is true of many people’s experiences just breaks my heart. If lifelong problems are left unresolved until a person’s final moments, it means those burdens were dragged by the person throughout their whole life, without healing or being free of them. This brings tears to my eyes! Think of the missed opportunities for joy, peace, forgiveness, and love. It shows me the importance of living in a way so that our families and friends have no doubt that they are loved; to live so that we do not harbor unresolved arguments or grudges. As Romans 12:18 tells us, “If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.” This encourages me to forgive, speak authentically, and live at peace, knowing that the important things will have been said. It especially shows me the importance of sharing the Gospel with all those whom I love, because oh, what an awful thing if we were to leave the true message of hope unsaid! Not everyone has an opportunity to share final words and thoughts with loved ones. That in and of itself is a gift, and one over which we have no control–Psalm 139:16 says, “all the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be.” Every day, we have the God-given choice to live so that when our time here is ending, our only need is to smile at our family and loved ones, say, “Goodbye, I love you,” and, “See you soon!” May we not miss our opportunities to live in such a way that our burdens will be light as we walk toward home. Amen.
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit.” Galatians 5:22-25
–Joni Byrd