From 7/19/2018:
Counseling, case management, and advocacy…..knowing which role to take when is a matter for prayer.
What some don’t understand is that when I stand in the gap for someone, I have spent hours and hours in the spiritual and emotional intimacy of the counseling room with her, hearing and talking about some of the deepest hurts and greatest hopes of the heart. God reveals when her heart is telling the truth. I won’t take that kind of stand on behalf of just anyone….but when I do, it is because of a firm conviction that that is what God has called me to do. Yesterday I was told by someone in authority, “All right, I will attempt to work this through on her behalf not because of her standing, but because of yours. It is your reputation and word that’s on the line here.” It did not seem like a sincere intent to assist but like a threat and an attempt at intimidation to back me down from standing with her. And it is exactly that attitude of threat and intimidation against this woman, experienced in my spirit in that moment as well, that was the reason it was necessary for me to advocate for her in the first place and that demands that someone be willing to speak up when authority is being wielded in a heavy handed way.
I love these women and I know that God brings them to me for a variety of reasons. There have been only a half dozen or so women in 10+ years for whom it was necessary to go to such an extent that it put my own reputation and credibility on the line, but in every one of those cases, it was a compelling conviction by God that that is what I was there for and in every case though I personally did not win friends due to the extent of my advocacy, the individuals for whom I stood got what was just and right. There have been also maybe three times I pushed into the fracas on behalf of someone, then realized I and the system were being used and I backed off and would not ever undertake assistance to those individuals again without God’s direct and compelling instruction. And there have been more than a few for whom God clearly had me refrain from taking up the banner of advocacy. Sometimes the best thing I can do is help them through counseling deal with reality and the consequences of their own conduct.
My willingness to get in the cage to fight for some who were unable to fight for themselves has been viewed as “distasteful” by some and has resulted in their judgment of me as unworthy of the call of God to ministry. Peacemaking sometimes means being willing to stand against abuses of power by individuals and on behalf of individuals, even when you take fire for it and have to confront the systems behind which the abusers hide.
I have no personal strength, only that given by God for any particular purpose. I am pretty fearless, though, because however any given battle ends, I know the war has already been won! I’m just part of the clean up unit that has to deal with satan’s remaining guerilla insurgents and their writhing throes among God’s people until Christ returns to assume his throne here.