I’ve been having some ❤️2 ❤️ conversations with an individual who has struggled with relapses- a bad relationship, a chemical substance, a negative way of thinking….but the conclusion she’s arrived at is that much of it boils down to self-sabotage and repeated disappointments when her own perfectionistic expectations are not met and her need for control is thwarted…… sounds like a pretty good self -evaluation. Now, to address the problems arising from those long-repeating patterns and change the behaviors that result from negative emotions what will you DO with what you have discovered in this journey? Because NO ONE is perfect. People, including we ourselves, will disappoint us at times. And NONE of us ultimately has any control over anything except our own response to life’s vicissitudes and victories.
“1,200 years before Descartes said his famous thing about “I think therefore I am,” this guy, St. Augustine, sat down and wrote “Fallor ergo sum” — “I err therefore I am.” Augustine understood that our capacity to screw up, it’s not some kind of embarrassing defect in the human system, something we can eradicate or overcome. It’s totally fundamental to who we are. Because, unlike God, we don’t really know what’s going on out there. And unlike all of the other animals, we are obsessed with trying to figure it out. To me, this obsession is the source and root of all of our productivity and creativity.,,,,,,,,,,For good and for ill, we generate these incredible stories about the world around us, and then the world turns around and astonishes us.,,,,,,,,,,,, if you really want to rediscover wonder, you need to step outside of that tiny, terrified space of rightness and look around at each other and look out at the vastness and complexity and mystery of the universe and be able to say, “Wow, I don’t know. Maybe I’m wrong.” ” Kathryn Schultz TED Talk: On Being Wrong